Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Too Blessed

I think I have just about finished my tests  for transplant evaluation.  I hope to get ABG's in the morning followed but new PFT's.  My plan is to go home on Friday, that being said....if my PFT's are low I will have to continue IV's at home for another week. Earlier this week, I did have an ecocardiogram of my heart and a CT of my lungs.  My understanding is that I will return to transplant clinic in a few weeks to meet with the doctors and discuss my test results.  At that time, they will decide if I will be placed on the active transplant list.  I keep telling myself that the doctors are going to tell me that I am not ready to be placed on the list.  But, {{{{OH>> MY GOSH!!!}}}}if they tell me I am a good candidate for transplant, my body will go into shock.

I pray as I begin this difficult walk in my life, that I can inspire someone with my experiences, my thoughts, and my life.   I am excited to see what God has in store for me as I begin this challenging stage in my life.

 I am way to blessed to be stressed!

A-Z about ME :)

I borrowed this idea from a fellow Cyster.

A: Age-36

B: Best girlfriend: Mim

C: Chore I hate: Ironing

D: Dad's first name: Chubby

E: Easiest person to talk to- G.I. Joe

F: Favorite drink- Mello Yellow

G: Gold or Silver- Silver

H: Height- 5' 5"

I: Iphone- Holy Moly... YES..

J: Junk food- Gummy worms

K: Kids- Skywalker

L: Longest car ride- to Disney World

M: Make-up- Not really

N: Not a fan of- Laziness

O: One wish- To breathe easy

P: Place- The BEACH

Q: Quote from a movie- "You know why I married you?... so I can kiss you anytime I want." 
Sweet Home Alabama

R: Restaurants:  Bonefish or Bayou Bill's Crab house

S: Song I last listened to- I won't let go..Rascal Flatts

T: Time of the Year- Hands down SUMMER

U: Unknown fact about me- My ears are always clean

V: Vegetables I dislike- green beans, okra, red tomato

W: Worst habit- biting my nails

X: X-rays for a broken bone- Many bc I broke both arms at the same time when I was 12.

Y: Yummy food I make- homemade creamy corn, mashed potatoes and gravy

Z: Zoo favorite- Penguins 

Monday, May 9, 2011

Focused on Faith

The Bible said, ‘For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God’ (Ephesians 2:8) 
Faith is a gift of God.  A thought comes to mind. Air that I breathe is a gift from God. It is  everywhere. But actually, I could choose not to breathe. Air is a gift from God and so is faith. It’s a matter of either.. we want to received it or not. Yes, faith is a gift from God but it is our job to ‘breathe’ and received faith from Him.  Faith in God means that I am willing to trust Him to carry me through my sickness.  He chose me to walk a life of sickenss.   Blessed with  my sickness, I have an urgency to focus on what is really important to me.  The clothing, the cars, and the items I posses are not what I focus on.  When I take pictures, which I love to do, I focus on fingers, toes, smiles, and holding of hands...always the small things.  Focus is amazing. Focus changes your perception in your life.  . Usually, how you feel about things, and the meaning of a particular experience, is all dependent upon your focus..especially on God.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Happy Mother's Day to me....

Don’t you love when a certain activity triggers a happy memory that instantly brings a smile to your unexpected,spontaneous, out of the blue smile. I look at these moments as little gifts. One little thought can fill my heart with so much joy. I can amuse myself for several minutes just by reminiscing about that one happy moment in time.

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.

My favorite two boys surprised me with a weekend visit.  After ball practice on Saturday morning, they drove over with homemade food and gifts.  I really did "kinda"...think they would show up for the weekend.  They brought me cookies from my sister and potato soup from my mom (THE VERY BEST!).  For supper last night, we walked down to Moe's.  That was the first time I have been out of my room since Monday.
We played fruit basket turn over all night.  I started off the night sleeping with Skywalker.  During the night, he got in the chair with his daddy.  When we woke up this morning, Skywalker had the chair to himself and G.I. Joe was in the bed with me

If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I'd finger-paint more, and point the finger less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
~Diane Loomans, from "If I Had My Child To Raise Over Again

I found this beautifully written poem this morning.  As I read it again and again, I starting thinking.. really?? Would I really do things differently?  I have raise my child with circumstances that are very rare and different.  I have raised him in the moment where every smile is special and every "i love you" could be the last. 
**This is when I know that being sick is also a blessing.

Friday, May 6, 2011

First Transplant Evaluation Test

I came back in the hospital on Monday.  I was on the sick road to nowhere so I decided to detour to the hospital early.  My PFT's were 50/35.  I still had a little room for sickness, but glad I came on in.  

Today, we started my first transplant tests.  I have already had at least 16 tubes of blood drawn.  I have had x-rays of my chest and sinuses.  I also had a sonogram of my abdomen this afternoon.  All I have left for today is a TB test.  So far, nothing to it....I may eat those words later on next week. 

Thank You LORD for facetime......I have been able to see and talk to G.I. Joe and Skywalker every morning and every night.  It puts the biggest smile on my face to see them.  Skywalker likes to walk around the house and show me everything.  He thinks it will make me feel like I am at home. 

 Skywalker got contacts today.  He was so excited.  He has never complained with his eyesight, but obviously he could not see according to the doctor.  He told me as soon as he left out of the office, "Mom, I sure have missed seeing a lot of things while I have been blind." He could not wait to go to the batting cage and hit some balls....or maybe that was his dad that was so excited...hmm.....